But they had a secret stash of Coca-Cola in the garage fridge.

I still don’t know why it was there. My parents didn’t drink soda. Maybe it was for guests. Maybe it was just inertia. But I knew it existed and that was enough.

Whenever I was stressed about school or upset at them, I’d sneak into the garage and take a sip out of one of the 20oz bottles.

That sip wasn’t about the soda. It was about rebellion. Self-soothing. Control. It was a quiet “f you” to rules I didn’t agree with, and a small moment of calm in the garage when I needed it.

Today, I’m an adult. I have adult money. I can buy soda whenever I want.

And because of that, soda means nothing to me now.

Standing in an immigration line in Vietnam last week, I realized something uncomfortable: this was a Tuesday for me.

For the people around me, this was a once-in-a-lifetime moment. First time in Asia. First time in Vietnam. Something they’d talk about for years.

I missed that uncertainty, that joy, the nervousness traveling to a new country. At this point, I’ve visited 60 countries in the world. I’ve had that ‘new country experience’ 59 times in my life and that novelty is waning.

I don’t think happiness comes from adding more things.

I think it comes from protecting the things that still feel special.

So this year, I’m not trying to upgrade my life, introducing new luxuries to post about on IG of Threads.

Instead, in 2026 I want to restore contrast.

When people talk about “account security,” they often jump straight to advanced tools, expensive subscriptions, or overly complex setups. In reality, the biggest risks to your personal accounts-especially financial ones, come from a few very predictable failure modes.

My goal is not perfect security. My goal is cheap, boring, resilient security that works even when things go wrong: providers make mistakes, phones get lost, or I cross borders and change SIM cards.

Here’s the simple system I use to protect my most sensitive accounts.

1. A Private Email Address I Fully Control

My most important accounts, banks, brokerages, crypto exchanges, tax portals, are all tied to a single, private email address that I never use anywhere else.

Why this matters

There are two major risks with “normal” email usage:

1. Provider lockout If Google, Yahoo, or Microsoft decides (correctly or incorrectly) that your account violated a policy or triggered fraud detection, you can be locked out. Losing access to your email is annoying. Losing access to your financial accounts because your email is locked is catastrophic.

2. Targeted attacks after data leaks Data breaches are inevitable. When an email address appears in enough leaks, attackers can infer:

   “This is probably the email used for important accounts.”

   I want attackers to not even know which email I use to authenticate money-related services, because they could leverage this in phishing emails.

My solution

• I own a custom domain
• I use a single, plain email address on that domain (no dots, or +wildcards)
• That address is only used for financial and identity-critical services

Even though the email is currently hosted on Google, I can move it to another provider at any time without changing the email address itself. That means:

• I keep control
• I avoid provider lock-in
• I can recover quickly if something goes wrong

As a bonus, because this email is used so sparingly, if it ever shows up in a breach or spam list, I know exactly which service leaked it.

2. A Cross-Platform Password Manager (Not Platform Lock-In)

The second pillar is a proper password manager. I personally use Bitwarden.

Why a password manager is non-negotiable

• Every account gets a unique, long password

• Passwords sync across:

  • Firefox and Chrome
  • macOS, Windows, iOS, Android
• I am not tied to a single ecosystem

I’ve watched friends switch phones or platforms and suddenly lose years of saved passwords because everything lived inside Apple Keychain or a browser profile. Recovering from that is painful and risky.

With a dedicated password manager:

• Switching devices is trivial
• Losing a device is annoying, but not life-ending
• Compromised passwords can be rotated quickly

Bitwarden also integrates breach monitoring, so I can see if any credentials associated with me appear in known leaks.

There are excellent paid options (like 1Password), but I deliberately keep my monthly subscriptions low. Bitwarden gives me what I need at zero cost.

3. Avoid SMS OTP Whenever Possible

Passwords alone are not enough. Two-factor authentication (2FA) is critical, but how you do it matters.

Why I avoid SMS-based OTP

SMS authentication fails in the real world:

• Phone numbers change
• SIM cards get lost
• Messages don’t arrive while traveling
• Accounts often outlive phone numbers

Your bank account should not depend on whether you currently have reception in a foreign country.

What I use instead

1. App-based authenticators whenever possible

   • Google Authenticator (or equivalent)
   • Works offline
   • Not tied to a phone number

2. Google Voice as a fallback

   • Used only when SMS OTP is unavoidable
   • Works internationally
   • Reliable ~95–99% of the time

In rare cases where neither option works, I fall back to my long-term U.S. phone number, but I treat that as a last resort because it’s expensive and fragile while traveling.

4. Designing for Loss and Failure (Because It Will Happen)

A core principle of my setup is assuming that bad things will eventually happen:

• A phone gets stolen
• A laptop disappears
• An email provider locks an account
• A service gets breached

The question is not if, but how disruptive it is when it happens.

This system minimizes blast radius:

• Losing a device does not expose passwords
• Losing a phone number does not lock me out
• Losing an email provider does not strand my accounts
• A single breach does not compromise everything

Security should reduce stress, not add to it.

Final Thoughts

I didn’t arrive at this setup by reading blogs. I arrived at it through experience.

I’ve traveled to over 60 countries. In that time, I’ve seen a lot and I’ve had my share of things go wrong. I’ve been mugged twice. My phone has been stolen three times. Sometimes it was taken straight out of my pocket. Other times it was snatched directly from my hand.

What surprised me most wasn’t how fast it happened, I always knew within a few seconds that my phone was gone, but how inevitable it felt once it did. The people who do this are very good at it. Once the phone is in their hands, it’s gone. There’s no chasing it down, no heroic recovery story.

That reality fundamentally shapes how I think about security.

Losing a phone already sucks. Losing access to your money, your identity, or your accounts on top of that is far worse. I don’t want my financial life to be fragile—dependent on a single device, a single phone number, or a single company’s fraud system making the right decision at the right time.

Fortunately, despite all of that travel and all of those incidents, I’ve never had a serious account security issue. I’ve never had my finances compromised. I’ve never been locked out of critical accounts at the worst possible moment. And I’d like to keep it that way.

Good personal security isn’t about paranoia. It’s about designing your digital life so that when something goes wrong—and eventually, something will—it’s an inconvenience, not a disaster.

Back when I was in high school (2004-2007) and college (2007-2011), the “uncool” kids hung out in the computer lab, experimenting with computers while the cool kids focused on developing skills in sports, music, debate, or just hanging out.

In my 2007 class of about 140 students, I didn’t really have a clique to hang out with, so I spent most of my breaks and lunches in the computer lab, learning how to write programs, break the school’s firewall, and even remotely shut down my bully’s computers before auto-save became a thing… [0]

In engineering college, the CS students were kind of the weird kids, even among the engineers.

This low supply of talent, constrained by how uncool computers were, resulted in decades of cushy, high-paying, low-stress, high job security [0], with double-digit annual salary increases and the confidence that even if my current job didn’t work out, I could respond to the five recruiters who cold-emailed me this week asking for an interview.

I remember looking around the room in college (and in my 20s), confused about why more women weren’t interested in tech. The jobs pay very well and offer a lot of flexibility in all the ways you’d want it (easy to find a new job if you’re not happy at your current one, unlimited PTO, flexible schedules, etc.).

It’s always been my dream to start my own startup. I’ve made a few attempts during that time, but nothing was ever as successful as my career working for others.

But in 2022, the world has changed.

Not because technology is unimportant or humans are replaced with AI. Software, data, and infrastructure will continue to shape the global economy. But the career dynamics that made tech uniquely attractive between roughly 2010 and 2021 have changed in fundamental ways.

There is a popular narrative that AI will “replace tech workers.” I don’t agree with that framing.

AI is a productivity multiplier. It changes how work is done, not whether the work exists at all. Skilled engineers who understand systems, trade-offs, and real-world constraints are still necessary—and will be for the foreseeable future.

The larger issue I see in my own career is simpler and more uncomfortable:

Too many people have become software engineers, and job growth has slowed.

The world is flatter: in 2010, for an Indian, Vietnamese, or Chinese person to learn programming, they first needed to learn English before they could write their first line of code. Now, coding education exists in so many languages that there are tons of highly talented engineers who don’t know English.

When Supply Outruns Demand

For a long time, software engineering was not considered a “cool” career. Before 2015, it attracted a relatively small group of people. As a result, demand vastly exceeded supply, and salaries rose rapidly.

After 2015, that changed.

Coding became aspirational. Universities expanded computer science programs. Bootcamps exploded. Online influencers promised six-figure salaries in months. In the COVID years (2020-2022), online influencers bragged about their WFH six-figure jobs (where the H in WFH meant “home”), and the number of graduates more than doubled in a decade.

At the same time, the tech industry’s growth rate slowed.

The result is a collapse in the entry-level job market and a painful experience for more senior talent and H-1B visa holders.

A Useful Comparison: English Teaching in Vietnam

A relatable example is the English-teaching market in Vietnam.

From around 2010 to 2019, English teaching was extraordinarily lucrative for Westerners. Demand was high, supply was limited, and so quality standards dropped to meet the low supply. Many schools hired teachers with no degrees, no experience, and sometimes not even native-level English—so long as they “looked Western.”

That era ended in 2019.

Demand for English education is still strong, but supply has exploded:

• Vietnamese teachers can now teach English effectively.
• Filipino teachers have excellent English at much lower wages.
• Many foreigners accept lower pay because the salary and Vietnamese lifestyle still exceed what they have back home.

The job still exists, but the power dynamics have changed.

Tech is experiencing the same shift.

Globalization Changes the Equation

Most of my observations apply to the U.S. job market, where competition has intensified significantly.

However, this is not universally bad news.

Western companies will continue to move work to lower-cost regions. In Southeast Asia, Eastern Europe, and parts of Latin America, tech job markets are still growing.

This creates an important nuance:

• The market is harder for average engineers.
• Strong engineers still do well.
• Geographic flexibility matters more than ever.

Why Tech Still Has Value

Despite everything above, I still believe tech is a useful skill set, especially outside the U.S.

Two reasons stand out:

• Transferability. Unlike professions such as law, pharmacy, or marketing (which are often tied to local regulation and language), engineering skills travel well across borders.
• Stacking advantages. Being great at English and good at coding is still a powerful combination in Vietnam and Southeast Asia.

Tech may no longer be a guaranteed fast path to wealth—but it remains one of the most portable, flexible careers available.

So Where Does That Leave Us?

The uncomfortable truth is that the tech industry is no longer in a gold-rush phase. It has matured.

That doesn’t mean people should avoid it. It means they should enter it with clear eyes:

• Expect competition.
• Credentials and real skill are better than pure credentials or skill alone.
• Understand that stability and outsized pay are no longer automatic.

And for those willing to adapt, there is still plenty of opportunity.

[0] - In college, I read news articles about teens being arrested for even more innocuous things than I did… So glad I didn’t get caught…

As engineers enter 2025, I am noticing a few trends in the tech world career space as Engineering Manager at a regional tech giant and unfortunately, the future looks bleak for p50 engineers.

Lower Demand

Managers Are Incentivized to Hire in Low-Cost Regions

Managers are measured by headcount. The number of people they oversee reflects the trust the organization places in them and the value it expects them to generate. Growing that number often translates directly to career advancement. It’s why a common interview question for management roles is: “How many people do you manage?”—followed closely by, “Do you manage other managers?”

When it comes to layoffs, managers and directors don’t want to cut staff. Their incentive is to maintain control over their organization and its influence within the company. But when finance orders a 5% reduction in headcount costs, directors have limited choices:

• Lay off employees and rehire in lower-cost markets [0]
• Implement return-to-office (RTO) policies to drive attrition (canceling backfills)

In 2023, Big Tech companies opted for layoffs with generous severance packages.

In 2024, they pushed RTO mandates and canceled remote positions.

In 2025, they cut deeply into “low performers” to avoid severance payouts.

As American workers are laid off, headcount shifts to abroad—evident in the continued surge of hiring in Bengaluru (timesofindia.indiatimes.com).

Bangalore remains at the forefront of India’s job market, boasting a 9.3% increase in job opportunities and salary growth compared to last year, as reported by TeamLease Services in its Jobs and Salaries Primer Report for FY 23-24.

Oct 2024, peoplematters.in

Cost shift

Startups and dev shops were once the launchpads for CS grads from non-traditional backgrounds. Experienced engineers flocked to big tech for higher pay, better work-life balance, and lower career risk.

With limited budgets, startups would hire fresh grads—university or coding bootcamp graduates—as low-cost, diamond-in-the-rough talent. After 2-4 years of experience, these engineers would often move to senior roles at big tech companies, doubling their pay and scope.

But today, fewer startups are getting funding, and many are more open to hiring internationally to stretch their budgets. This shift leads to…

More Supply

The number of people who can code is growing at an unprecedented rate—fueled by formal education, bootcamps, and self-taught developers. This isn’t just a trend; it’s an economic shift.

Locally

Coding bootcamps now graduate hundreds of thousands of students each year. Even if only 10% land jobs, that still adds tens of thousands of new developers competing in the market.

In 2015, fewer than 20,000 professionals attended coding bootcamps to improve or reskill. By 2021, that number had grown fivefold to 100,000. By 2025, it’s projected to reach 380,000. — HolonIQ

Pop culture has also played a role. The Social Network appeared on over 70 critics’ top 10 lists (Wikipedia). The rise of YouTube coding influencers, Twitch live-coding streams, and viral TikToks about tech salaries has made programming more aspirational than ever.. Even viral trends like “How old are you, and how much do you make?” fuel interest in tech careers.

Meanwhile, the number of computer science graduates continues to rise. In 2021, U.S. universities produced over 100,000 CS graduates (NCES).

This shift doesn’t just affect those laid off—it also increases competition for those still in the job market.

The top 30 H-1B employers hired 34,000 new H-1B workers in 2022 while laying off at least 85,000 workers in 2022 and early 2023. — EPI

Internationally

Thomas Friedman once said, “The world is flat.” That remains true today. As access to technology and education spreads, the dominance of any one country in coding skills is rapidly eroding.

Fifteen years ago, if you lived in South America or Asia, learning to code meant first learning English and getting reliable access to a computer—barriers that put American kids five years ahead of the rest of the world. But in the last five years, that gap has shrunk dramatically.

• Low-cost laptops are now widely available in developing countries.
• Online and in-person English classes make documentation more accessible.
• Free and paid coursework is available to anyone with an internet connection.

Big Tech has also played a role. Companies hiring internationally don’t just fill positions—they train engineers who previously had little access to formal CS education.

When I traveled to Vietnam in 2016, I remember thinking how difficult it was to succeed as a coder there. Before even starting web development, you needed to learn English just to read the documentation for Twitter Bootstrap or Ruby on Rails.

Fast forward to 2025, and things look different. React documentation is now fully available in six languages, with partial translations in 32 more. With tools like ChatGPT, Google Translate, and YouTube, English proficiency is no longer a prerequisite for learning to code. At Grab, we’ve hired many talented engineers with limited English skills.

The global talent pool isn’t just growing—it’s leveling the playing field. A coder in São Paulo or Bangalore now has access to the same knowledge and opportunities as one in Silicon Valley. The future of tech isn’t just in the U.S.—it’s everywhere.

Part 2 will discuss the Data Science field.

Upwinds for DS Jobs

Engineers can use AutoML to create models

I was chatting with my friend Gregory Azuolas about what it really takes to train an ML model at Google. The company has gone all-in on automating ML training—not just by streamlining data pipelines and automating code deployments, but by eliminating much of the manual effort traditionally required to build models.

Google’s AutoML infrastructure allows engineers with no background in machine learning or data science to train classifiers across a wide range of data types and scales. This shift reduces the need for specialized ML engineers to fine-tune models manually.

Gregory acknowledged that AutoML models might not be the most efficient in terms of power consumption or latency. But in his view, the real cost in ML isn’t inference—it’s model creation. While companies will continue optimizing inference efficiency (see DeepSeek-R1), the number of jobs dedicated to this task is relatively small. The bigger trend is clear: the barrier to training ML models is getting lower, and the role of traditional ML engineers is evolving fast.

Engineers can user LLMs to replace models

If performance and cost isn’t super critical, engineers can just use an GPT-based model to perform their classification. Before ChatGPT, custom classifiers must be trained and retrained as the business / regulations change. But since ChatGPT can do everything and is ready to do everything, there is no need to spend weeks or months trying to design and train a custom model for each business cases.

Instead of a team of DS people outputting 1-2 models per month, 1 engineer can modify a prompt to chatgpt in days and now there is a now classification ready for production.

Once the AI has classified enough production data and inference costs (either dollar or latency) exceed budget, a custom model can easily be trained using automl by an engineer.

Data cleaning and generation

Historically, data scientists spent a significant portion of their time collecting, labeling, and cleaning data—often writing complex scripts to sanitize and validate datasets before they were ready for model training. But today, the bottleneck isn’t human effort; it’s inference time. Advances like DeepSeek and Stanford’s Alpaca have made major strides in leveraging inference for data generation and refinement.

As a result, each data scientist can accomplish more with fewer resources, reducing the overall demand for headcount.

[0] - Some people use the term “cheaper”, but I don’t think the talent should be considered cheap, b/c that has negative connotations of lower quality.

TL;DR: Stick to Apple’s “Basic” ads version for most scenarios.

Advertising a mobile app can feel overwhelming, especially for indie developers with limited budgets. With Apple offering two ad account types—Basic and Advanced—it’s tempting to believe that more control means better results. After all, who knows your app’s audience better than you? However, as someone who’s worked on ad optimization at Yelp, I’ve seen firsthand how trying to micromanage ad campaigns can lead to wasted money and frustration. The truth is, Apple’s Basic Ads are designed to do the heavy lifting for you, delivering cost-effective results with minimal effort. This guide explains why starting with Basic Ads is often the smartest choice and when (if ever) you should consider upgrading to Advanced.

Basic: Apple handles everything for you, optimizing for the lowest cost-per-install. Advanced: You gain control over keyword targeting but risk inefficiency.

Apple offers two advertising account types for app developers: Basic and Advanced, each tailored to different needs. The Basic account is built for simplicity and efficiency, with Apple managing everything from ad placement to targeting. Their advanced algorithms deliver ads to users most likely to install your app, maximizing your budget with minimal effort. This hands-off approach is ideal for indie developers or newcomers to app advertising, as it focuses entirely on cost-per-install efficiency. Simply set your budget, and Apple handles the rest.

In contrast, the Advanced account provides more control but introduces complexity and risk. It lets you target specific keywords, define audience demographics, and set manual bids for placements. This customization is valuable for niche apps or products with unique targeting needs. However, it demands expertise and constant monitoring to avoid costly inefficiencies. Poorly optimized campaigns can quickly burn through your budget, making Advanced accounts risky for those without a clear strategy.

Apple’s Basic Ads outperform Advanced Ads for most indie developers by leveraging Apple’s unmatched optimization capabilities. Instead of micromanaging keywords or bids, Basic Ads automate the process to find users most likely to install your app at the lowest cost. Apple’s vested interest in your success ensures their ads prioritize cost-effective results. By minimizing your workload and costs, Basic Ads offer a reliable way to grow your app without requiring deep marketing expertise.

Advanced Ads may be worth considering in specific cases where Basic Ads fail to reach key audiences. If your app serves a niche market or requires a particular demographic for success, Advanced Ads allow you to fine-tune targeting and allocate budgets toward high-value users. However, transitioning to Advanced Ads requires data from Basic Ads to understand user behavior and cost-per-install trends. Without this foundation, you risk inefficiency and wasted resources. If you choose Advanced Ads, start with a small test budget and refine your strategy gradually.

For indie developers, Apple’s Basic Ads offer a perfect balance of simplicity, efficiency, and effectiveness. They free you from the complexities of manual targeting and ensure optimal ad spend. While Advanced Ads provide more control, their risks and required expertise often outweigh their benefits. By starting with Basic Ads, you can collect valuable insights, optimize your campaigns, and scale your user base without unnecessary stress or expense. Keep it simple, trust Apple’s optimization, and focus on growing your app efficiently.

As a hiring manager, I’ve hired and said good-bye to co-workers and directs from India, Malaysia, and the USA countries in contract employment and at-will roles.

At-will in the USA

In late 2020, I wanted to leave Yelp as soon as possible. When I got a job offer from Grab, I provided Yelp the standard 2 weeks notice, last day being Friday and then Grab started me the following Monday. This rapid change had perfect timing, because my new-hire grant was priced about 40% below our IPO price a year later. Coworkers that joined during the pre-ipo period (7 months after I did) had their shares valued at ~$10 IPO price (currently trading at $4.10/ea). Most of the time, Start your vesting as soon as possible is the best strategy.

Contracted termination in Singapore

When I got my first big project at Grab, I was assigned a product manager that halfway through the project put in her 60 day notice to leave Grab. During those 60 days, you’re expected to perform your full job duties until the day you leave. Because the project was scheduled to end 2 weeks before her last day, her manager didn’t bother transitioning her responsibilities to another person. Unfortunately for me, she was visibly disengaged with her work. I wasn’t able to get the answers I needed at the rate I needed them, and thus couldn’t deliver the project on time. She effectively had 2 months of part-time labor for full time pay with her coworkers paying the price with their own careers.

Hiring in India

A coworker give a 60 day notice to leave the company. He stayed engaged until his last week, which everyone appreciated, but hiring a backfill was a hot mess. I don’t know if internal bookkeeping delayed searching for a backfill, but it wasn’t 2 months after he left did we find a replacement. Unfortunately, this replacement also had a 60 day notice they needed to give their current employer. Our group made due with a hole in our group for 4 months (2 months hiring + 2 months waiting for them to join + 1.5 months of training). 10 days before their start date, the new hire messaged the company saying their current employer gave them a raise once they saw Grab’s offer and would not be joining. With the role being potentially vacant for an additional 4 months, the manager ended up just losing the headcount.

Hiring in Malaysia

A team member in India informed me they wanted to leave the company and put in their 60 day notice. I negotiated with People Operations and my manager to terminate him immediately (but keep him on payroll for 60 days to meet the contract obligations). After my experience with the lady in Singapore, I thought a visible hole on my team would be less painful than trying to get someone that doesn’t want to be here to complete their work. I communicated to other teams that we didn’t have the bandwidth to deliver on our project commitments because he was gone.

I opted to backfill the role in Malaysia, for various reasons. After 2 months of interviewing, we found a great candidate. Unfortunately, this person also had a 2 month contract that they needed to complete, resulting in a 5 month hole on my team between one person leaving and another person coming in.

Hire and Fire

With contract employment, there is a probation period ranging from 3-6 months. During this time, the employment is practically “at-will” where the employer can terminate an employee instantly without the 60 day notice period. This system incentives companies with teams of many redundant employees (for example call centers) to “hire and fire” during that period if anything smells wrong, because if they just wait 1 day, they could be stuck with an underperformer for months.

As difficult as at-will employment might feel sometimes, it is much more efficient for the employee and the employer if they are able to leave the job when they want to leave the job. Employees maximize their engagement (and career growth) if they are able to shift onto their next chapter faster and employers can better manage

I moved into Engineering Management in 2022 at Grab, which gave me a seat at the table when it came to HR issues and supporting women within the organization.

3 surprising areas that I was surprised to learn.

01 Focus on the positive

I cringe everytime I hear people list off negative biases against women, because it comes off like a high school bully running down a list of insults. Queue the sensitivity training episode of The Office or The Onion’s Fat Kid Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt.

It is important people develop a mindset to recognize and stamp out biases, but more space should be given to celebrate how women (and men [0]) can positively contribute to the organization.

Instead of saying, “People need to stop thinking women are bad at _ or can’t do _” but should frame it at what women are awesome at or what men can do too! This thinking perpetuates stereotypes and leads to toxic biases.

02 Provide opportunities early

The average age of a woman entering into motherhood is 30.3 years old 2018 nytimes.com. This also happens to be the age men and women develop the skills and maturity to enter into leadership roles. But to qualify for a leadership role, companies expect a strong track record of at least 1 year of successful project delivery, demonstration of responsibilty under pressure (like on-call incidents), and leadership within their team.

But this timing competes with their biological clocks and entering motherhood. Once they start having babies, the must take 3-6 months off work to recover from the pregnancy and bond with their new child, making it impossible for them to achieve that leadership role promotion for the prior 6mos.

As a woman prepares for maternity leave, they are given less critical projects and opportunities (for a few reasons: don’t stress the mother while pregnant and since she will be gone for 6 months, she will not be around to support critical launches or delivery delays). Once she returns from maternity leave, she has a ramp up period while she adjusts to changes that happened while she was gone and her new responsibilities at home. This means pregnancy delays their career movement, by up to 1 year way from their.

03 Give fathers space to contribute at home

Birth is a traumatic experience for women and they will need to to recover their health from the major event, but men are more than capable to be supportive parents and assisting with the new childcare responsibilities. The default should not be women should be granted the extra time off to dump the time

Women taking longer leave than men also results in more difficult transition of homecare tasks to be equally shared. Once a woman have taken on the habit of homecare tasks for 3 months due to her havint the time off, the husband and wife have a difficult time sharing the burden once her time is up.

[0] - My sister, an engineer at a certain fruit company, complained over Thanksgiving dinner that she is commonly designated as “the notetaker” during meetings. Men can take notes too! I’ve heard that Anthony Tan is excellent at it.

04 Equity

Everything above is about equality, but now I want to share my thoughts about equity: where do women need that extra boost?

Women have many social, family, healthcare responsibilities outside of the workplace, more so than men. Employers should consider these needs when defining a company benefits package. For example, offering women fertility care so they can manage their family planning along side their career development.

My recent coaching session at Grab has profoundly impacted my approach to management, particularly in the realms of feedback and problem-solving. Embracing curiosity has opened new avenues for understanding and addressing challenges, while providing space for growth empowers individuals to find their own solutions. By fostering an environment where curiosity thrives and autonomy is valued, I am committed to cultivating a team that not only resolves issues effectively but also grows and develops together. Stay tuned for more insights as I explore these transformative ideas further in my upcoming blog article.

Two key takeaways continue to resonate with me a week later: the importance of cultivating curiosity and allowing space for growth. These concepts have significantly influenced my approach to providing feedback, adding a fresh perspective to my managerial toolkit. Stay tuned as I delve into these transformative ideas in my latest blog article!

1/ Be Curious

Historically, my 1:1 conversations went like this:

me: Hi, I noticed there was an issue in ___. can you tell me more about that? them: don’t worry I fixed it. me: thanks for fixing it. but how can we prevent this from happening again? them: I will do better next time. me: thats not the answer I was looking for. can you be more specific? them: I will be more careful. me: … me: let me just give you the answer. What if we try doing A, B, and C?

In retrospect, I acknowledge the limitations of my approach as I lacked sufficient information to confidently recommend A, B, and C. I now recognize the importance of cultivating curiosity about the problem at hand before imposing my own biases and assumptions. Moving forward, I aim to adopt a more inquisitive mindset to better understand and address challenges.

2/ Give them space to solve their own problems

In problem-solving, guiding individuals with strategic questions proves more effective than managers simply offering personal advice. By delving into the root cause through thoughtful inquiry, people can tap into their creativity to discover solutions on their own. This approach fosters self-discovery and empowers individuals to navigate challenges autonomously.

A few times per week, we have deep discussions about Eastern European culture, the Russian-Ukrainian war, and adjusting to American culture.

Food: Snowy Tomato Slices

A popular holiday dish in Ukraine is “Помидоры С Майонезом и Сыром” or Snowy Tomato Slices. With smiling faces, they presented to me a tray of shredded cheese, tomatoes, and 2 tablespoons of white mayo.

Unfortunately, I didn’t take a photo, but they looked like this:

Source

The flavor was exactly what you’d expect: cheese, mayonnaise, and tomato. They told me the history of this dish, rooted in the USSR’s failure, where limited ingredients were available. This reminded me of “Depression Meals” my grandparents told me about when they were growing up. My grandma would be sent to the store to make purchases alone because she was a “cute little girl,” and the shopkeepers wouldn’t say no to her, allowing her to borrow until the debt could be paid.

Politics: What will Ukraine do with deserters?

In U4U Facebook groups, people brutally attack young men seeking parole because they want them to stay to fight or participate in the local economy.

They told me that when the war first broke out, many Ukrainians felt sorry for the people that ran. They abandoned their friends, family, jobs, and personal possessions to pack up their bags and hike across the border to escape a war that would only last a few weeks.

Now, the Ukrainians that have stayed are upset that the expat Ukrainians have such happy and prosperous lives. The expats are earning more money, traveling, and living in safety. Back in Ukraine, life is dangerous and more difficult to obtain basic items.

These feelings of jealousy and unfairness are visible in the Facebook groups that support refugees and political bills. On Facebook, keyboard jockeys attack anyone trying to leave Ukraine or migrate to the USA. They look to see if they have already left Ukraine and claim that “there’s no need to sponsor this person because they are already in the EU.” They post news articles saying that if young men leave Ukraine, they will be arrested when they return or how Ukraine will cut off consulate and banking services to those that leave.

But I know the Ukrainian government is smarter than this. I think their current goal is to discourage people from leaving so they can operate their economy and fight their war, but once the war ends, they will be desperate to attract the talent (and money) that left Ukraine back. I suspect the government will flip and offer tax incentives to bring in the wealth that is currently generated by their expats.

Food: Tea culture

America is a melting pot of tea cultures, but I learned that Ukraine, like India, is highly opinionated about teas but in unexpected ways.

When I visited the Grab office in Bangalore, India in October 2023, my team took me around to a few chai shops where they give you a shot glass of the most amazing boiling hot sweet milk tea I have ever had. I often ordered 2-3 different flavors so I could experience them all. During one of these lunches, my team member in a deadpan tone shared, “Kevin, you cannot have tea without milk. If there is no milk, then that is not tea.” I had a good chuckle and made a mental note to bring high-quality green tea on my next trip.

But in Ukraine, I heard the exact opposite: “How can you ruin tea by adding milk?”.

If you have any comments, send me an email at kevin@sparkstart.io